Difference between revisions of "Humor/Flakes"
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"Mom, I'm sick of ordinary cereals! Don't you have anything new?" |
"Mom, I'm sick of ordinary cereals! Don't you have anything new?" |
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</td></tr></table> |
</td></tr></table> |
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+ | |||
− | <p> |
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<table> <tr> <td align=left, valign=top> |
<table> <tr> <td align=left, valign=top> |
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Mom: |
Mom: |
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emblazoned across the front and top, over a large lambda logo] |
emblazoned across the front and top, over a large lambda logo] |
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</td></tr></table> |
</td></tr></table> |
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+ | |||
− | <p> |
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<table> <tr> <td align=left, valign=top> |
<table> <tr> <td align=left, valign=top> |
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Boy: |
Boy: |
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into his mouth] "Mmm! What is it?" |
into his mouth] "Mmm! What is it?" |
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</td></tr></table> |
</td></tr></table> |
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+ | |||
− | <p> |
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<table> <tr> <td align=left, valign=top> |
<table> <tr> <td align=left, valign=top> |
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Mom: |
Mom: |
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additives!" |
additives!" |
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</td></tr></table> |
</td></tr></table> |
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− | <p> |
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<table> <tr> <td align=left, valign=top> |
<table> <tr> <td align=left, valign=top> |
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Boy: |
Boy: |
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his throat] |
his throat] |
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</td></tr></table> |
</td></tr></table> |
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− | <p> |
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[Pan to Dad walking in, suit jacket draped over one arm and still fumbling |
[Pan to Dad walking in, suit jacket draped over one arm and still fumbling |
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boyishly with his tie.] |
boyishly with his tie.] |
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− | <p> |
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<table> <tr> <td align=left, valign=top> |
<table> <tr> <td align=left, valign=top> |
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Dad: |
Dad: |
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Haskell I've been hearing about?" |
Haskell I've been hearing about?" |
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</td></tr></table> |
</td></tr></table> |
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− | <p> |
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<table> <tr> <td align=left, valign=top> |
<table> <tr> <td align=left, valign=top> |
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Mom: |
Mom: |
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conspicuously at the place where a large "1.4" is visible] |
conspicuously at the place where a large "1.4" is visible] |
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</td></tr></table> |
</td></tr></table> |
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+ | |||
− | <p> |
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<table> <tr> <td align=left, valign=top> |
<table> <tr> <td align=left, valign=top> |
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Dad: |
Dad: |
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in Mom's direction] |
in Mom's direction] |
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</td></tr></table> |
</td></tr></table> |
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− | <p> |
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<table> <tr> <td align=left, valign=top> |
<table> <tr> <td align=left, valign=top> |
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Mom: |
Mom: |
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at the camera] "Haskell! A great way to start the morning!" |
at the camera] "Haskell! A great way to start the morning!" |
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</td></tr></table> |
</td></tr></table> |
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− | <p> |
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<table> <tr> <td align=left, valign=top> |
<table> <tr> <td align=left, valign=top> |
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Dad: |
Dad: |
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[in the background, whining] "Honey!" |
[in the background, whining] "Honey!" |
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</td></tr></table> |
</td></tr></table> |
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− | <p> |
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<table> <tr> <td align=left, valign=top> |
<table> <tr> <td align=left, valign=top> |
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Mom: |
Mom: |
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back to the table to serve her hubby a fresh bowl of Haskell flakes] |
back to the table to serve her hubby a fresh bowl of Haskell flakes] |
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</td></tr></table> |
</td></tr></table> |
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− | <p> |
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[FADE OUT] |
[FADE OUT] |
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+ | ---- |
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− | <hr> |
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David Hanley (david@nospan.netright.com) wrote: |
David Hanley (david@nospan.netright.com) wrote: |
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<blockquote> |
<blockquote> |
Revision as of 06:38, 24 January 2006
Haskell Flakes
Shamelessly stolen from comp.lang.ml -- ed
(Note there's actually a response at the end of this message...)
[FADE IN]
[A young boy sits at a table in the kitchen. Outside the window we see the morning sun setting in a rich blue sky over rolling green hills and yellow flowers. The young boy's ravishing mother stands by the kitchen counter, looking busy making bag lunches.]
[Close up of the boy looking dejectedly at his bowl of cereal.]
Boy: |
"Mom, I'm sick of ordinary cereals! Don't you have anything new?" |
Mom: |
"Try this, honey!" [hands the boy a colorful package, the words Haskell emblazoned across the front and top, over a large lambda logo] |
Boy: |
[after pouring the cereal flakes into his bowl and cramming a spoonful into his mouth] "Mmm! What is it?" |
Mom: |
"It's called Haskell! The ingredients are all natural! No chemical additives!" |
Boy: |
"And it tastes great too!" [rotates his baseball cap back-to-front and with a look of determination starts shoveling the flakes greedily down his throat] |
[Pan to Dad walking in, suit jacket draped over one arm and still fumbling boyishly with his tie.]
Dad: |
"Gosh! Something sure smells good this morning!" [sniffs experimentally at the Haskell flakes, then notices the box of Haskell cereal sitting prominently in the middle of the table; lifts the box and peers at it; suddenly his eyes widen with recognition] "Hey! Is this that Haskell I've been hearing about?" |
Mom: |
"Yes, it's new and improved!" [takes the Haskell box and taps one finger conspicuously at the place where a large "1.4" is visible] |
Dad: |
"Wow, count me in too!" [forgets about his tie and slips quickly into a chair at the breakfast table; lifts an empty cereal bowl expectantly in Mom's direction] |
Mom: |
[smiles as if she knew this would happen, then steps forward, holds the box of Haskell in both hands next to her glowing face and looks straight at the camera] "Haskell! A great way to start the morning!" |
Dad: |
[in the background, whining] "Honey!" |
Mom: |
[now laughing, shakes her head as if to say 'tsk, tsk', and hurries back to the table to serve her hubby a fresh bowl of Haskell flakes] |
[FADE OUT]
David Hanley (david@nospan.netright.com) wrote:
Is there any language which is a somewhat simplified ML? I like the type system of ML, but the all-encompassing language is somewhat complex. I suppose what I am looking for would be something like strongly-typed scheme.
Try Haskell. Haskell's lazy semantics are simpler to reason with than ML's. The language has a lot of sugar, but the syntax is pretty intuitive (compared to SML's, at least, which seems to get a lot of complaints). Haskell's module language is much, much simpler than SML's, yet nearly as powerful [1]. Also, since there are no implicit side-effects, there are fewer gotcha's in general.
[1] Nicklish, Jan and Peyton Jones, Simon. "An Exploration of Modular Programs." The Glasgow Workshop on Functional Programming, 1996.
-- Frank Christoph Next Solution Co. Tel: 0424-98-1811 christo@nextsolution.co.jp Fax: 0424-98-1500